Accidental Destiny
by theonewhoburnedthesun
Summary: Zuko reminisces on his past and how his journeys never panned out they way he expected. AU Zutara; based on Books 1-3, but imagine episode 60 with a different ending . Written for Day 1 of Zutara Week 2012. Serendipity: Discovering something nice while trying to find something else.


**Written for Day 1 of Zutara Week - ****Serendipity:** Discovering something nice while trying to find something else. 

* * *

Zuko honestly never understood what he was looking for, until the weeks preceding the end of the war. Encircled by expectations, bound by duty to a life he never really wanted to lead on. His future was clear from an early age, even before his face became forever scarred - before his mother left and his father acended the throne. He was heir to a war that could never be won, and cursed to fight until the bloody end.

Of course, it was never portrayed this way to Zuko; after all, every drop of blood spilt was for the glory of the Fire Nation.

Zuko was born with something he inherited not from his father, or his father's father, or even his famed great-grandfather Sozin. Stirred in with the greed and hatred of his upbringing, was an inherently present conscience. A heart lined with empathy and kindness. Though, to Zuko's father, it was weakness. He expected a son, an heir, to be as thirsty for blood as he was.

For years, especially after his mother disappeared, Zuko hated this part of himself. It betrayed what he thought he wanted. It made him even angrier than he already was.

When he returned with his sister from Ba Sing Se, that part of him scratched at his heart. Zuko refused to let his anger thaw; he didn't want to give into the feelings of guilt. He didn't want to concede that, not only did he betray Uncle Iroh, he betrayed himself.

Days he spent secluded, only breaking away from solitude for infrequent visits with Mai. She made him feel better, most of the time. Other times her talk of his prince-hood took him back to the months he had spent as a commoner. He couldn't decide if those were the worst or the best days of his life. Looking at Mai, he could smile.

Picturing himself as a simple busboy at Uncle's Tea shop made his heartache longingly.

On the Day of Black Sun, he finally decided that his fate did not belong to the Fire Nation, but the Fire Nation's fate belonged to him. All pretenses evaporated when he heard his father's plans to destroy the Earth Kingdom with the comet; destroy the place he found a part of himself that he'd been looking for. His own honor was unimportant; Zuko knew that there was no honor in senseless death.

Gaining the Avatar's trust was difficult, but not impossible. Zuko had spent months hunting the twelve-year old Airbender, but hadn't comitted unforgivable acts like his forefathers. Eventually, Aang honored Zuko as his master. They met the first firebenders together. Such a bond, Zuko knew, was unbreakable. Even Toph and Sokka warmed up to him, despite his social awkwardness and of course his past.

But not Katara.

Late nights around the fire, she'd watch him with hooded eyes - skeptical of his alliance. It made Zuko uncomfortable, though he wasn't sure why. He was used to being an outcast; being Prince Zuko made him the shame of the Fire Nation and a tyrant to the rest of the world. He just wanted to be _Zuko, _and that was the persona he adapted with the others.

At first, Zuko rationalized that she would get over it, like the rest of them did. Then as time passed and her aprehension failed to dissipate, it made him angry.

After Zuko confronted her about her antagonism, it was clear that she still held their sad past against him.

That night in the crystal caverns beneath Ba Sing Se, he felt the stirring confusion as he tried to reconcile his past with his present. He reached out to the young waterbender who he had antagonized so much, he tried to empathize. And it worked; he felt the electricity as she touched his scar. He hadn't ever let anyone touch the molten skin. But he let her, in a moment of clarity and vulnerability. In that moment, he could accept himself. He was just _Zuko_. He controlled his own destiny Though the revelation was tainted by the uncertainty in his heart; thus, he fell back into the role as Prince Zuko.

Not only did Katara recall that day as vividly as he did, but she held the crimes of the Fire Nation against him. The death of her mother. Zuko, as he traveled the world, loathed that that the other nations hated his home, his heritage. Thousands of years of balance spoiled by a hundred of war. He didn't want the world to see his people that way anymore. For a reason he could not identify, continuing to have Katara hate him was something he didn't want. Especially not Katara.

When Zuko offered to help Katara avenge her mother, he thought his agenda was to gain her trust and approval so he could fully ascend as a member of their group. Zuko had always though Katara to be a simple watertribe girl with a peaceful agenda, except for self-defense. Most of her time was, after all, spent defending herself against him. Once they infiltrated the Southern Raiders ship, Zuko found that he was dead wrong. She was powerful; he thought that her skills rivaled those of any Waterbender he'd ever seen. She was not simple and most certainly not peaceful. He didn't know what he expected when they confronted the Southern Raiders captain. He hadn't known that she possessed an ability he'd only heard rumors of.

_Bloodbending_. An art so cruel that it was deemed impossible. Zuko's eyes widened when her palms scissored the air and the Souther Raider crumbled to the ground, bones grinding as he tried to fight against her ministrations. Zuko was mesmerized, knowing the power she possessed. As he watched her eyes flood with pain and rage, Zuko knew that the raider deserved it.

Though, the man she bloodbent wasn't the man she was looking for, much to Zuko's displeasure. He was dissapointed that he hadn't gained her friendship as easily as he planned.

Yon Rha was a decrepid old man who didn't deserve to live. Zuko gazed upon his wrinkled, dirty form with disgust. He has the audacity to kill, and then live on a pathetic excuse for a life. Katara amazed Zuko again when she commanded the rain to stop falling, creating a dome around them to shield away the act she was about to commit. He could see it in her eyes, she was going to kill him. Zuko's heart raced, almost gaining a high. He was living his own desire for revenge through her, Zuko realized. He wanted to kill the man responsible for his mother's disappearance.

Then Katara surprised him, again, when she granted him mercy. The shards of ice fell from the ground and melted into puddles of water as if Katara had left the air around them untouched. She couldn't do it, and Zuko struggled to grasp why. We would have done it in a heartbeat.

They were different.

His heart sunk and twisted in ways he didn't understand at the thought. Would he kill his father if he were given the chance? He had his chance on the day of the eclipse; he could have slit his father's throat. Zuko didn't chose to spare his father because he was merciful; he chose to leave his father to suffer at the hands of the Avatar.

Would he have done it?

Katara and him returned together in silence, only to be bombarded with questions by Aang and Sokka. She snaped slightly, saying she'll never forgive the monster.

She turned to him, warmer eyes making Zuko hold his breath. "I'm ready to forgive you."

The seconds it took for her to to close the space between them seemed endless. Zuko's heart raced as his arms looped around her, hanging in the curves of her hips. How long had her hips been _that_ curvy? Zuko suppressed a sigh as he shut his eyes.

They parted at the appropriate time, and Zuko turned slightly to see her saunter away. He forced himself to look away, push his mind from the dangerous territory it was encroaching on."

Only a few weeks later, the day of Sozin's Comet fell upon the world. He could feel the impossibly powerful flames inflating in his chest; he was a walking inferno. Zuko wasn't sure why he asked Katara to accompany him to the Fire Nation. It seemed like the right thing, to get her as far from his father as possible. The only forseeable problem in the capitol was his sister. And with the knowledge that the dragons granted him, Zuko was certain that he could extinguish Azula's rage-filled fire.

Agni Kai. He knew she would challenge him. Azula was...weird. Her hair was cut jaggedly and her face was screwed as she taunted him. He knew he could defeat her.

When he taunted _her,_ he did not expect Azula to break the rules of Agni Kai.

Her whips of lightning wer coming toward Zuko, but not at him. He turned slightly to see that the blue and white strands were going towards Katara.

Millions of emotions raced through him as he launched himself through the air. Self-hatred, pain, longing, jealousy, love. He never really knew what love was. He never understood what loving someone meant. Until now.

The futile attempt to redirect the lightning before it struck him failed; he cradled the energy instead, feeling the jolting pass through is fingers and into this stomach, electrocuting his ribcage and finally his heart.

Numb, he crumbled, twitching as his heart tried to restart itself. His chi was drained, his thoughts jumbled. The sensation of death was sobering, and his mind began to clear. He saw every moment of his life, flash before him. His mistakes, his failures, his losses. Somehow, none of those moments compared to the good he had done. His anger paled in comparison to the love that had been quietly growing on the outskirts of his heart hand mind.

Katara, touching his face. Katara, holding him for the smallest moment.

Katara.

Like being reborn, Zuko shuttered and his eyes popped open. Big blue eyes burned to his as she hovered her glowing hands over his stomach.

"Thank you," he breathed, trying to force a smile as her watched warm tears stroll down her tanned cheeks. If her weren't so weak, he'd raise an arm to wipe them away.

"I'm the one who should be thanking you."

His lips parted and he knew that he loved her then. After all that he'd done, to her especially, she forgave him. Wholeheartedly, she forgave him. Zuko weakly wondered if she was feeling the thumping in his chest as her hands pressed against his abdomen.

"'Tara," he whispered, a sigh falling from his lips. His voice was softer than usual. He was vulnerable, almost-dead.

She forced a smile, through her tears, and nodded. Seizing her healing ministrations, she laid her body over his chest. It wasn't a hug, it was her body overtop his. Balancing herself on his shoulderblades, Katara stroked a hand across his cheek.

She opened her lips, as if to speak, and then snapped them shut. Zuko watched her, the late of the comet in the sky forming an orange halo over her head.

"I just wanted you to like me," Zuko said suddenly, a bubbling laughter falling from his lips as he continued to eye her. She smirked and tilted her head.

"Well I do."

Zuko's face straightened and he closed his eyes. Of course she did. She was just happy he didn't die for her.

"...and so much more."

Those words struck, him and he opened his eyes to see her face hovering just inches above his. Her cool breath washed over his skin, smelling of jasmine and mint. He licked his lips, gazing at her as the space slowly closed...

_I was looking for my honor, and I found my destiny._

_I was looking for my destiny and I found frienship._

_I was looking for friendship, and I found love._


End file.
